Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
