How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
