my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Randomize