you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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