dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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