i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize