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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd

  (443): View more from Maryland

  wasted?

  (410): View more from Maryland

  im pocohantasssss

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"

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• (818): View more from California

  I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  you thought your balls were fighting each other...

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado

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• (903): View more from Texas

  I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."

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• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  enjoying your night?

  (1-780): View more from Alberta, CA

  do dogs like to salsa?

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  I dont know if that answers my question or not

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