Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
