this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
