I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
