he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
