Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
