Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize