i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
