Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
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