I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
