im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
The feeling are messing with the penis
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
