plz talk dirty to me
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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