So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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