I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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