One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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