is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
As shirtless as possible
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
