i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize