This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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