I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
