New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
im holly from the hills drunk
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Randomize
