dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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