Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
