girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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