Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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