So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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