Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Someone came in the potted fern
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize