Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize