The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
