The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
