I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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