I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize