Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
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