marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I just got carded by a ten year old.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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