Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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