So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
