she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
