It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
