Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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