Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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