i just wanna soil my oats bro
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
