Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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