its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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