His pubic hair was longer than his dick
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize
