The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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