BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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