you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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