is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize